This is what I share with my clients about my journey
Featured image credit @nathaliarodrigues via Twenty20
How I Learned to Love ALL of me: I now realize that self-love was the root of my awakening. When I learned to have compassion for myself, when I learned to truly love all the parts of me, is when womanhood felt real and where I could experience the fullness of my contribution to humanity. One could fast forward the story of my life with about 5 major benchmarks.
- Joining the military in 1999. At 17-years-old, I felt invincible and empowered. I got to see the world through a new perspective and officially, now there was nothing that I could not do. I didn’t know what self-love was and I got to learn what it was not.
- Turning 21 in Iraq, my coming of age.
- Turning 30 and having the divine enlightenment of being a woman.
- Beginning and completing transformational personal development. Without realizing it, I was being attracted to personal development programs that would help me to recreate who I was. No, actually, I was creating someone entirely different. She was not me anymore.
- Meeting the love of my life. The transformational work made this possible. This was the ultimate fulfillment of self-love in my life. Because I loved myself so hard, I was able to create the ultimate love in relationship with a partner.
I recall after one of the trainings, in 4 short days, I would emerge as someone who had the power to shift my life. The “realist” turned into an optimist and solution-creator.
The mess and chaos, sadness, fogginess, and toxic relationships were all becoming less and less. Then I would find a life coach that helped me look at myself through an entirely different lens.
Questions for Reflection
I would find myself asking, “How am I responsible for this?” It was a very powerful question. Or my favorite is, “What is possible when I _____?”
Or anther, “How does this serve me?” These were just 2 of the many questions that I would learn to reflect on as I was building myself into the woman that I knew I was meant to be.
Inner Work is a Mental & Emotional Muscle
Next, as a result of my inner work, I didn’t worry anymore; I was attracting love in all the right ways; I was experiencing healing conversations with my loved ones; I was finding that I could be “selfish” without the guilt. I felt liberated.
Anything is Possible for You
I am still on this journey of discovering myself (we are all like onions, I believe). AND the good news for you is that anything is possible for your life.
The biggest lessons that I learned are:
- How to love myself.
- How to be present at the moment.
- How to give up my ego (well this is a work in progress).
- How to be quicker to embrace giving apologies (it’s usually for the other party’s good and not just for me).
- How to embrace neutrality versus right and wrong.
- How to be generous and compassionate with myself.
- How to be a contribution from a neutral space.
- How to use my voice.
- How to embrace my inner nerd and querks.
- How to have fun and not always take myself so seriously (also a work in progress).
IF you are at a cross roads as I was …
Let’s quickly go through a few points that may support you in reflecting on whether it is a good time to work with a life coach.
- How would you like to be different in your life?
- What is getting in your way?
- How are you attracting what you want in your life?
- What results would you like to create in working with a coach?
- How do you identify with the world when you have success and challenges?
- What practices are in place in your life that do not support your creation of your 10-life?
- What practices would you like in place to support your goals?
- What would you create if anything were possible?
- How would you like to be remembered?
- Is there a gap between who you are and who you want to become?