The Art of Winning People Over: The Key Differences Between Trust and Rapport 

 By Rickey Lamontè “Memoirs of a Retired Gangster”

In any organization or industry, the ability to build relationships with others is crucial to success. But what is the difference between building trust and building rapport, and how can you use these skills to win people over?  

First, let’s define these terms. Building trust involves demonstrating reliability and consistency over time. When someone trusts you, they believe you will follow through on your promises and act in their best interest. This is important in any business or personal relationship, as trust is the foundation for mutual respect and cooperation.  

Building rapport, on the other hand, is about establishing a connection with others. It doesn’t necessarily have to involve the top-tier individuals or the most powerful groups. In fact, rapport can be built among people who work together towards a common goal, regardless of their position in the hierarchy. They trust each other to do their part and make things happen. 

This is how you can succeed and grow in any organization, as promotions and progress are often the result of the rapport you’ve built. Whether you’re starting at the top or the bottom, the key is to build rapport with others and continue to do so at every level.

So, what’s the key to success? The answer lies in both building trust and building rapport. By doing so, you can establish yourself as a reliable and respected member of your team or organization.  

Allow me to illustrate how I successfully built rapport when I was running the black market of the weed industry. When I would first start doing business with a dealer to buy a certain amount of marijuana, it was a new relationship, so they were understandably hesitant to trust me. However, I made sure to consistently come back to purchase more products, this demonstrated I was serious about my business and capable of flipping products, which through time demonstrated my reliability. Gradually, they began to trust me more and even gave me extra products to sell for them, a sign of their confidence in me. Through this approach, I was able to build a strong reputation in the industry and ultimately make a lot of money and helped other people make a lot too!

The same principle applies in the corporate world. If you’re the lowest person on the totem pole but you consistently deliver on your tasks, people will start to trust you with more responsibility. If someone in a higher position notices your hard work and reliability, they might even promote you. This is because they see you as an asset to the company.  

In both cases, building trust is crucial. Once you have a track record of being trustworthy, people will be more willing to do business with you and give you more opportunities. For example, if you take out a small business loan and pay it back on time, the bank will be more likely to give you a larger loan in the future. And if something goes wrong and you lose money, a bank that trusts you will be more willing to work with you to get back on your feet. Overall, building a good reputation takes time, but it can pay off in the long run.

It’s also important to keep in mind that you have the power to influence others either positively or negatively. Your ability to do so is dependent on whether you possess strong leadership skills. People are naturally drawn to individuals who exhibit such skills, as most are striving to improve themselves and achieve success.

When you’re trying to influence others, it’s important to realize that not everyone will be receptive to your ideas. You need to focus on building relationships with the core group of people who are most likely to be influenced by you. Trying to influence everyone can lead to too much judgment and negativity. To be successful, you need to lead by example and show people what you’re capable of. For instance, if you’re running a company and you want to attract top talent, you need to demonstrate your company’s strengths and successes. This will inspire people to want to be a part of your team and help them achieve their own goals.

It’s important for people to not always focus on big moves and big things, but to pay attention to the smaller details and small moves that can lead to success in the long run. Ignoring the small things can cause them to snowball and become big problems. This applies to all the points we discussed earlier. I believe it’s a fundamental factor that applies to everyone.

In conclusion, building trust and building rapport are both essential skills for winning people over. By consistently demonstrating reliability and establishing connections with others, you can establish yourself as a trusted and respected member of your team or organization. And by paying attention to the smaller details, you can ensure long-term success and growth.

Check out these quotes from top leaders who reflect on success, trust and the power of influence. 

  • Oprah Winfrey
    • “The key to realizing a dream is to focus not on success but on significance–and then even the small steps and little victories along your path will take on greater meaning.”
  • Walt Disney
    • “The difference between winning and losing is most often not quitting.”
  • Tyler Perry
    • “The key to life when it gets tough is to keep moving. Just keep moving. Developing a good work ethic is key. Apply yourself at whatever you do, whether you’re a janitor or taking your first summer job, because that work ethic will be reflected in everything you do in life.”
  • Madame C. J. Walker
    •  “If I have accomplished anything in life it is because I have been willing to work hard.“ (America’s First Black Female Entrepreneur)
  • Mark Cuban
  • Barack Obama
    • “We need to internalize this idea of excellence. Not many folks spend a lot of time trying to be excellent.” 
  • Jeff Besos
    • “It really is that simple. It’s also that complicated,” Bezos said. “Because in order to do hard things well, you must have integrity and competence. That means doing what you said you were going to do — and delivering.”

Article By Rickey Lamontè

Presented by L.A. STYLE Industry Leaders Network

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